We’ve Come to the End of the Road

Tomorrow we will point our bow towards Florida and sail away from the turquoise waters of the Bahamas. With any luck, 28 hours later we’ll pull into a slip in Fort Pierce where Kairos will rest, awaiting her next crew. Our sailing adventure is coming to an end and we are full of mixed emotions. Even though we knew our transition to the cruising lifestyle would be temporary, it’s still incredibly sad to see it come to an end. We’ve fallen in love with the resourceful sailing community, the incredible beaches, and the genuine island people. It almost seems impossible to walk away from it all. But at the same time, we are looking forward to some of the comforts associated with land life and we’re excited to see where our next adventure takes us.

We didn’t make the decision to take this journey lightly. We gave up a home that we adored, we pressed the pause button on our successful careers, and we said goodbye to our friends and family. We missed weddings and birthday celebrations, we weren’t there when new family members were born, and we were absent at family get-togethers during the holidays. We had to make sacrifices in order to have this experience. So, was it worth it? When people asked me 18 months ago why we decided to trade in our house for a sailboat, I told them that we were seeking 3 things: 1) A challenging adventure that we could share with the dogs, 2) quality time together in our first year of marriage, and 3) a chance to explore new places.

Challenging Adventure

Before we bought our boat, I had stepped onto a sailboat less than a handful of times in my life. I didn’t have a clue how to sail or navigate waterways. Now, I’m a salty sailor and will be getting my Captain’s License within the next month. I’ve come a long way. All four of us have. Rob can now dock our boat with ease and thread the needle to find the perfect anchor spot. Baxter who was once scared of waves, now jumps in happily. At first Jaela couldn’t walk on deck without sliding around and now she trots around in circles patrolling while we’re gone.

The cruising lifestyle is full of challenges. In addition to learning how to sail, we’ve had to be our own diesel mechanics, plumbers, carpenters, and electricians. Sailing to remote locations means we have to be resourceful when things fail. And things will fail. The salt water environment is incredibly corrosive and even the newest boats break systems. When we end this adventure, we will have close to 4,600 miles under our belts. Some of those miles were smooth sailing, but others we had to fight hard for. There were rough seas, thunderstorms, tears, seasickness, and sleepless nights. But we did it. It’s overcoming these setbacks, that make the crystal clear waters and white sand beaches that much more enjoyable.

Quality Time

In the last 18 months, I can count on one hand the number of days Rob and I have spent apart. How is it spending 24/7 together? Of course we occasionally argue and bicker, especially in bad weather when emotions run high on a sailboat. But during our first two years of marriage we have been working together towards a common goal—our sailing adventure. We are now like a well-oiled machine and our relationship is stronger than ever. We’ve shared an amazing experience and made memories that will last a lifetime. Through this experience, we have discovered how much stronger we are together than as individuals. I can’t think of a better way to start off our lives together.

Exploring New Places

Just glance through our photo gallery and you’ll see we have explored some incredible places, many of which are only accessible by boat. And while many of these islands have similar elements (gorgeous beaches, clear water, white sand), each one is unique. It’s discovering what makes each island special that has been the most rewarding part of cruising the Caribbean. From the mouthwatering markets in the French islands, to the hundreds of rivers and waterfalls in Dominica, to the lush green hills of Kitts and Nevis, to the incredible beach bars in the Virgin Islands, to salsa dancing in the streets of Puerto Rico, to the beautiful smiling faces in the Dominican Republic, to the fabulous restaurants in Turks and Caicos, to the cool turquoise clear waters of The Bahamas, we have loved and truly appreciated every experience along the way.

I think it’s safe to say that we found exactly what we were looking for when we set out on this quest. But these aren’t the only things that we discovered over the last 18 months.

Facing Fear

I’m being careful here when I say we have faced fear instead of conquered fear. Conquering fear implies that once one faces their fear, they are no longer afraid. That is certainly not the case with me and sailing. In fact, it’s pretty much the exact opposite. The more I learn about boats, weather, and sailing, the more I’m aware of everything that could go wrong and therefore, the more terrified I am each time we pull up the anchor and set off towards our new destination.

But we don’t let this fear stop us from doing what we love and after each passage I feel more accomplished. We were seeking an adventure and fear is a part of that. We just have to make sure we don’t let ourselves be limited by it.

Losing Independence

You might consider this a bad thing, but hear me out before you rush to judgement. Our independent successes are one of the things that drew us towards one and other in the first place. We each had our own careers, our own hobbies, and our own friends. And we like that about each other. Of course, we shared many things, but we were never really dependent on each other. That is not true for boat life. Even the simplest tasks, like walking the dogs, becomes a two-person chore.

We rely on each other immensely. We no longer work independently, but rather as a team. And it’s amazing what we can accomplish together. There’s no doubt that we were in love well before we ever stepped foot on Kairos. But we have gained even more respect for each other through this journey, because we both know that we couldn’t have done it without the other.

Living in the Present

I kinda expected that we would have our entire future planned out by the end of this adventure. I assumed we’d have tons of free time to ponder our options and decide what’s next. But that’s not what boat life is about. It’s about living in the present. We couldn’t make plans more than a day or two out, because we wouldn’t even know what island we would be on. Weather drove all of our decisions and our focus was always on immediate needs. Where can we get water? Do we need to catch food for dinner? Will this anchorage be comfortable once the weather shifts?

Boat life forced us to stop fretting about the future and start living in the present. We began truly enjoying each day and each location. We fell in love with every beach and explored each island the best we could. We have no idea if or when we will return, so we wanted to make the most of it. And now that our sailing adventure has come to an end, we still don’t know what’s next. We’ll work it out over the next few months. But for now, we’re going to enjoy today and the excitement of not knowing.

So, was it worth it? Absolutely. It wasn’t always easy, but it was always an adventure. One that I will always love and treasure. But now it’s time to start our next chapter…

“Man sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future. He lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.”  –Dalai Lama XIV